When Is Storytelling Manipulation? How to Use Stories Ethically
A few months ago, one of my clients reached out to ask: “We are mandating that employees return to working in the office starting January 1, 2022. What story should we tell to communicate this?”
My reply surprised them.
“You shouldn’t tell a story.”
While I am a big fan of storytelling to inform, influence and inspire, it doesn’t fit every situation.
If you try to tell a story for this situation, you come off as sincere and authentic as a used car salesperson.
People will roll their eyes so hard they give themselves a headache, and their trust will dissolve.
Next time you need to communicate something, their eyes will twitch, and they won’t trust anything you say.
Stories do connect people to new ways of thinking and can often influence someone’s actions.
But there is a line between persuading and manipulating.
Your audience can sniff out manipulation, and storytelling will also work against you.
Stories connect us to emotions.
The disgust and distrust they feel will be coded in their brains….and will stir up with any future communications.
Think of when you’ve heard someone you didn’t trust say something. You just felt “ewww…yuck!”
Next time you saw them, you probably experienced that same feeling.
One insincere or manipulative message can taint the perception of all future communications from the person.
There is a difference between using storytelling for an initiative and for a policy.
Policies are decisions with associated behaviors that have consequences. You can typically create a finite list of dos and don’ts.
Initiatives are tied to strategies and aspirations.
While there may be some required aspects to them, there is a lot of choice and varying degrees of effort and engagement from the employee.
The exact thing you want to harness and motivate through a story.
How do you manage the line between influencing or persuading and manipulating? Two things are important:
The intention behind your story is the lead indicator on whether you are persuading or manipulating. Charities often share gripping stories to persuade you to donate or take action. They are clear about their intentions. When the intention is not clear or hidden, it can become manipulation.
Treat people like adults. If you have a policy mandate or requirement – communicate that. Don’t try to dress it up or effusively message all the ways you think it will be great for them. People will prefer and trust a straight communication to one that doesn’t treat them like an adult.
These rules aren’t meant to discourage your storytelling.
They are intended to free you up and provide clarity on when to tell stories.
Most companies don’t struggle with storytelling abuse, they struggle with not leveraging storytelling enough when communicating.
I have found an increase in companies prioritizing storytelling in their budgets for 2022 and 2023.
What may have seemed like a trend four or five years ago is now a fundamental competency that companies are looking to strengthen.
This is my favorite thing, to help companies understand the neuroscience and how to scientifically hack the art of storytelling.
Once you understand what happens in our brains during storytelling, you will wonder why anyone wastes time and brain power by sharing data or information without a story.
Each time I work with a CxO or a company on storytelling, I ask how they decided to make it a strategic investment. Some of their responses:
We are undergoing a digital transformation. We haven’t done a good job at telling that story to our employees or our clients. By equipping employees with storytelling, we can show all the problems that will be solved as a result.
We have all of these insights and data from our customers, and it is regularly disregarded. We have the opportunity to disrupt our industry if we can connect with the data and integrate it into our strategy.
My team is newly formed. While I think they like me, I don’t know if they trust me. I want to use storytelling to better connect and help establish trust.
Our people are our products. Our success depends on our people connecting with our clients, gaining their trust and guiding them forward. Storytelling is key in that.
We sell the future for our clients. They have a vision for their desired reality, and we provide the security to help them get there. That requires faith. Stories help us show our clients how they can achieve their outcome and minimize risk.
I kept thinking I needed to tell my origin story as a company. I’m now realizing I have moved so far away from that, what is most important is why I do what I do now.
Each year I hold an annual meeting for my employees to share the strategy. I know I can use storytelling to create stronger understanding and connection in these.
The leadership team has been working at an unsustainable pace this year. We want to pause, regroup and be thoughtful about how we proceed going forward. Storytelling is at the heart of that discussion
We’ve been telling the same story for years – and have had consistent growth. But if we don’t make shifts and move into new markets, we will quickly be lapped. It’s time to revisit our strategy and our story.
This is why I love storytelling.
By focusing on story, the aperture brings into focus the strategy, culture, and leadership.
Because it is all connected and demonstrates what is desired and valued.
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